Woman posts incredible Facebook response to man who sent unwanted explicit nude snap
Why any man thinks it's okay to send a woman a random photo of their genitals is still one of the most perplexing questions of modern times.
And yet still they come. Women suffer a perpetual barrage, it seems – an unrelenting stream of penises.
What can they do to stop them?
Sarah-Louise Jordan decided to write an amusing, ironically formal letter when she discovered an unsolicited image in her picture messages .
"I found a surprising picture in my messages," wrote the 28-year-old on Facebook.
"So, I did the only English thing there was to do – I wrote them a letter."
The letter reads
"Thank you for the unexpected and unsolicited submission of your penis portrait for our consideration. We regret to inform you that it has failed to pass our most basic standards of quality control at this time.
"However, for a nominal fee we can offer you a report that will help you change that.
"The A4 report, provided via postal service, will include a personalised booklet that covers the following:
"Why genitals are not an acceptable conversation opener (a step by step guide to saying hello).
"How to appear as though you weren't raised by wolves.
"Better ways to deal with your sexual frustration.
"How to dress your penis for social media (a rough guide to pants).
...the missive continues
"Penis reading: a new form of palmistry that may help you unlock the key to your future.
"We will also answer questions you might have such as:
"Do I have too much time on my hands?
"Why did my penis fail basic standards of quality control?
"(Note: the number one reason for this occurring is that it is attached to a bigger dick than itself.)
"Finally, as a gesture of goodwill we intend to offer two free samples with all of your future penis portrait submissions:
"An inventive critique of your pride and joy.
"And a surprise consultation with your closest available family member about your portfolio.
"We trust this exciting offer is acceptable and look forward to working with you in the near future.
Sarah-Louise 's Facebook post proved popular and was soon shared by more than 1,000 people.
Another person who spotted it shared it on Twitter, too.
I AM CRYING !! This is BY FAR the best response to dick pics I have ever read.— Maelle & Diction (@maellevie) October 23, 2016
Thank you Sarah-Louise Jordan. pic.twitter.com/wvE7MABMAz
"I AM CRYING!" wrote @maellevie .
"This is BY FAR the best response to d*** pics I have ever read. Thank you Sarah-Louise Jordan."